The Rock That is Higher Than I

Have you ever been in love with country you've never been to? Because I am. Have you ever cried over people you haven't even met yet? Because I have. I am already so in love with Laos and the students and people that I will meet that I have grown impatient at the thought that I still have two weeks before I will be there. My time in Colorado has been great but exhausting. Sitting in class from 8-5 has taken a toll on me, but the work has been well worth it. I have also met so many amazing people who are passionate about the same thing I am. I have built friendships with people who will be teaching all over Asia and the Middle East. I've only known them for a couple weeks but they already feel like family. I'm going to miss them all dearly but i'm ready for Laos.

With less than twenty-four hours left in the states my heart has become overwhelmed with emotion. I am both excited yet filled with self-doubt What was I thinking moving to a country I've never been been to, a place that wasn't even on my radar just a few months ago. But as the doubt consumes my thoughts I hold on to the knowledge that I am not going this alone. I have been adequately equipped to do good work and I have my teammates on my side. I also have the care and support of seventy plus other teachers who are preparing to move to Asia as well as friends and family back home.

So tomorrow, self doubt and all, I will take the risk and fly to Asia. I'll spend the next two weeks doing practicum in Cambodia before finally making my way to Laos. I've been warned that this is going to be the most difficult year of my life. And i'm sure it will be and i'm sure my year in Laos will be filled with transitions, hardships, and challenges. But the thought of not going to Laos breaks my heart and scares me more than any trial I may face. I can no longer imagine my life without Laos or my students and i'm not even there yet.

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From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I